I'm With My Boyfriend
by JudeDeluca
Summary: Reboot/Post-Legion Lost. Querl and Lyle are on their first date. B5/IK.


Disclaimer: Characters owned by DC Comics

This was a writing commission I did for someone who wanted Brainy and Lyle on a date. Specifically, this is the Reboot version of the two, post Legion-Lost.

* * *

"Are you sure this is where you want to eat?"

"I think it's hilarious. Why? You don't like it?"

"I just wasn't expecting it be so… colorful."

Querl Dox, a.k.a. the Legionnaire known as Brainiac 5.1, surveyed the surroundings he was sharing with some perplexity. His boyfriend, Lyle Norg, just giggled. The two were on their very first official date, which was to comprise of dinner, a movie, and then maybe some… exercise.

Lyle had picked where they would eat and what movie they would see, and managed to convince Querl, or Brainy as he was often called by their teammates, to join him on Earth for the evening instead of having dinner on Legion World. Lyle had picked Planet Krypton, a theme restaurant based around Earth's rich history of superheroics. Even a thousand years later, the establishment was decked with replicas of mementos from famous battles and famous heroes, and the staff even dressed up as certain heroes and villains.

"Says the gentleman who looks like a blonde salad bar. Not that I'm complaining." Lyle joked.

"Says the gentleman who is the cover boy for 'Headbands Monthly.'" Querl retorted, concerning the black headband Lyle almost always wore.

"It is Headband Quarterly." Lyle "corrected" Querl, looking faux insulted. They were soon joined by their waiter.

"Hi! Welcome to Planet Krypton. I'm Aquaman, can I take your order?" The waiter was dressed as the classic Aquaman of gold and green, not the surly, one-handed Aquaman.

"Brainy?" Lyle asked.

"I'm still trying to decide." Querl was going over the holo-menu but couldn't make up his mind.

"Can we just get a plate of All-Star Nachos for an appetizer please?" Lyle asked their waiter.

"Sure. It comes with a variety of dipping sauces, including our special for today, the Dr. Feta Cheese sauce. And would you like anything to drink?"

"I'll have a Martian Mineral Water. Querl?"

"Coffee, please." Querl didn't take his eyes off the menu.

"Coming right up." And with that their waiter departed.

"Need any help?" Lyle asked.

"I'm fine. I'm just trying to find something that's not so… punny." Querl motioned.

"Well, while you're doing that, I think I'll go wash up before he gets back with our nachos."

"Mmhmm."

As Lyle got up, he bent over and gave Querl a quick peck on the cheek.

"Be sure not to strain yourself before dessert." Lyle quipped.

Querl blushed and buried his face back into the digital list of entrees.

Lyle headed in the direction of the bathrooms, but then, making sure Querl wasn't watching him, turned and strode over to find their waiter again.

"Excuse me?" Lyle asked the classic Aquaman waiter. "You see the green guy over there?"

"Which green guy?" The waiter asked. Lyle saw there were four other people with Querl's skin color.

"Um, the blonde green guy." Lyle specified.

"Yes what about him?"

"Well, it's his birthday today, and, you guys do that thing where you have the waiters come over to tables to help celebrate someone's birthday, right?" Lyle innocently asked.

"Yes indeed sir. Would you like us to-"

"Yeah, but, I want to specify one thing."

Lyle whispered something into the guy's ears.

"Of course. Not a problem."

Lyle was planning on leaving a big tip.

…

When Lyle made it back to the table, he saw that the waiter had left their drinks and a pretty big plate of hot nachos. Querl hadn't touched any.

"Are you okay? You were gone a while." Querl pointed out.

"Yeah, I had to wait for them to refill the soap dispensers. The sauces didn't congeal already, did they?" Lyle started to pile his plate with tortilla chips.

"They are still intact. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Fine, why?"

"You look a little edgy?"

"Just enjoying your company."

"Is that supposed to be a compliment or an insult?"

"Shut up and eat your appetizer, Brainboy."

Later, the two had ordered what they wanted for dinner, and after finishing up, Querl noticed Lyle still looked a little edgy.

"We still have plenty of time to make the movie before it starts."

"I know." Lyle dabbed his mouth with a napkin.

"So why are-"

"SURPRISE!"

Querl nearly died of a heart attack when he was suddenly ambushed by a parade of Supergirls. Well, waitresses dressed like Supergirls. One took out a paper hat marked "BIRTHDAY BOY' and planted it on Querl's blushing head. Another, more buxom Supergirl, placed a plate with a big slice of chocolate cake in front of Querl. The cake had a lit candle placed on top of it.

"HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FROM ALL OF US TO YOU. WE WISH IT WAS OUR BIRTHDAY, SO WE COULD PARTY TOO!"

Lyle clapped along while they sang. Querl was ready to drop dead, but not before he was going to kill Lyle.

"Don't forget to make a wish."

…

"I still can't believe you did that."

"Why? I can believe it."

The two had slid into seats in the dark and somewhat crowded theater. Lyle was the only one who ordered snacks. Querl had completely lost his appetite after that barrage of Supergirls… although he did find himself sneaking handfuls from Lyle's popcorn. And he had ordered a small soda to settle his stomach.

"It's not even my birthday today." Querl muttered.

"Think of it as a chance to make up for all the other birthdays we didn't celebrate together." Lyle offered that interpretation of the previous events.

"Promise me you won't tell Andromeda about what happened." Querl dreaded if she had found out about that incident.

"Afraid she might get jealous?" Lyle joked in all good humor.

"That's the least of my worries."

"Relax. I won't tell her." Lyle reassured his boyfriend.

"Thank you." Querl relaxed a little.

"I'll just show her the pictures."

Querl almost choked to death.

"I just got cherry soda up my nose, thank you very much. Excuse me."

A couple of minutes later...

"You okay?" Lyle asked.

"No thanks to you." Querl icily said.

"You're fine." Lyle sighed, seeing the return of Brainy's slightly frosty nature.

"Has it started yet?"

"No. You just missed a preview for a Braalian romance and a frat boy comedy that takes place on Rimbor."

"So nothing important."

"Unless you like Braalian romances and frat boy comedies on Rimbor."

"_-to get ourselves a treat!"_ The ad on the screen finished. Then suddenly, it turned black, before it the words:

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 666

Flashed on the screen.

"How do they keep making these movies I wonder." Lyle asked, not expecting an answer.

"Things became somewhat difficult for the filmmakers after they briefly brought Jason back as a real human in the 300-plus films. The name Jason was then passed along several individuals, including a pair of identical twins." Querl explained in a monotone voice. "There was then the infamous Jason Wars era, followed by the Time Paradox movie that saw the film line being rebooted again."

"…okay."

"_Hey girls, why don't we try selling some cookies at that creepy campground!"_

"_Isn't that where all those sexy, sexy teenagers died a hundred years ago?"_

"_No I'm pretty sure they died in the pet cemetery, over there."_

"Because sexy teenagers are always dying at pet cemeteries." Querl deadpanned. Lyle snickered.

10 minutes later, and the girls are screen had already found an excuse to take their clothes off.

"_Oh no, I got the thin mints all soggy, and now they're staining my uniform!"_

"_Well take it off Lyssa. I'll take mine off so you won't feel self-conscious."_

"Wow this is super inappropriate behavior for girl scouts."

"Considering they are played by chesty 24 year olds, does this surprise you?" Querl inquired.

"Nah."

"_Oh hello mister, would you like some Samoans? Oh what a pretty machete!"_

CHOP

"And that doesn't surprise me either." Lyle said.

"Mmhmm."

"Does this movie suck?" Lyle asked Querl.

"Oh yes it does."

"Are you having a bad time?"

"I'm with you, aren't I?"

"Yeah…"

"Then no."

"Oh my God you are so corny."

"More than the popcorn?"

"OH MY GOD WHY DID YOU SAY THAT."

"Shh!" Someone said.

"You shh I'm with my boyfriend."


End file.
